Mary Rose Cook's notebook

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The Mars Volta, Vedamalady

The Mars Volta, Vedamalady

11 Vedamalady.mp3


Here, according to Last.fm , are the bands I have listened to the most over the last seven years. I have put asterisks next to the bands that feel like a part of my identity. When I think about these bands, I get a warm glow. When I talk about them, I say “I fucking love”.


Dear and the Headlights *

Sunset Rubdown *

Bob Dylan *

Des Ark *

[Women](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women_(band)) *

[The Paper Chase](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Paper_Chase_(band)) *

The Mars Volta

Animal Collective

Meshuggah

[The Blood Brothers](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Blood_Brothers_(band))

[Converge](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Converge_(band))

[The Acorn](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Acorn_(band))

Xiu Xiu

Joanna Newsom

Beach House

Arcade Fire

Hurray for the Riff Raff

A Silver Mt. Zion *


These identity bands have some common traits.


One. I love at least two of their records. Dear and the Headlights: both of their albums. Sunset Rubdown: all of their albums. Women: both of their albums. Des Ark: all of their live acoustic records. The Paper Chase: Now You Are One of Us and God Bless Your Black Heart . A Silver Mt. Zion is the exception, here. Horses in the Sky is one of my top ten records, ever. The rest of their albums probably aren’t even in my top fifty.


Two. I admire the aesthetic they achieve. Dear and the Headlights. The most beautiful melodies by anyone, ever. Bob Dylan. The deeper you go into his lyrics, the more you find. Women. The Beach Boys as a noise rock band. The Paper Chase. Find the most beautiful melody, then destroy it with how hard you feel it. Des Ark. Equate the art with the artist. Aimée Argote puts no distance between her manifestation in real life and her manifestation in her art. She makes music that, when heard, might be detrimental to her actual life.


Three. I find pieces of their music very meaningful. It is hard for me to cite examples, because music is so far from words. Not only is it impossible for me to explain why I love Bob Dylan’s line, “Let me dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free”, but it’s precisely because of its wordless meaning that I like it, and it was Dylan who taught me that alogical emotion is worthy of trust.


Four. I admire (my conception of) the song-writer as a person. Sunset Rubdown’s Spencer Krug has a solo project, Moonface . The Pitchfork review of the Moonface record, Organ Music Not Vibraphone Like I’d Hoped, said Sunset Rubdown’s [Dragonslayer](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dragonslayer_(Sunset_Rubdown_album)) is “A personal record about the toll that the worlds inside someone’s head takes on his relationships.” Des Ark. Aimée Argote sings about being a broken, high-functioning person. She sings about immovable, incidental, unpolitical queerness. Bob Dylan. He constantly moves on from his previous successes. As seen in the documentaries, Dont Look Back , and No Direction Home : he lives this life on the road half in love with Joan Baez, half in love with his own head.


But, most of the entries in that list are unbolded. These others are the bands that I simply listen to a lot. And I have listened to De-Loused in the Comatorium and Frances the Mute an awful lot.


I can’t identify with The Mars Volta’s music. Cedric Bixler-Zavala’s lyrics mean nothing. He chooses words that are one, impressionist remove from their actual meaning, rather than assembling a rich, internally consistent network from a few versatile base operators. Omar Rodríguez-López’s approach to arrangement is to chuck everything in. By saying everything, you say nothing.


I really like the Tony Scott film, [Enemy of the State](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enemy_of_the_State_(film)) . It is a thriller that is brilliantly thrilling. In the same way, The Mars Volta’s music cuts in on a primal level and makes me want to sing and dance, which is kind of what music is supposed to be all about.


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Omar Rodriguez Lopez Group, My horror is in Park, Drive Me Away Troubled Heart

Omar Rodriguez Lopez Group, My horror is in Park, Drive Me Away Troubled Heart

Omar Rodriguez Lopez Group Live Los Angeles(WIP) I - YouTube


I have a weakness for prog.


I don’t really get Deantoni Parks’s drumming on the newest Mars Volta record. In this video, I think I get it.


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The mobile my dad gave me for Christmas

The mobile my dad gave me for Christmas


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Le Cercle Rouge

Le Cercle Rouge


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Daft Punk, One More Time

Daft Punk, One More Time

Daft Punk - One More Time - YouTube


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Margaret

Margaret

[Margaret (2011 film) - Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Margaret_(2011_film))


I tried to find a still to illustrate this post. A still to illustrate the film. This is impossible. It can’t be the shot of Lisa shouting at her mum. It can’t be the shot of the bus driver bluffing his way through his interview with Lisa. It can’t be the shot of Darren crying. It can’t be the shot of the class debate blowing up. Margaret is just people talking. The shots are designed to show these conversations. As stills, they convey no information. There is little artistic observation in the locations, the colours, the montage, the framing. All there is are the words and the characters’ tones and expressions as they say them.


The most appropriate frame would come from the opening credits. These show New York crowds crossing streets in slow motion. They show the people lit up who are on stage and the people in darkness who are not. They make the ordinary lives of ordinary people as fascinating as those of fictional characters.


Margaret is a mess. It has too many side plots. It overdoes its crescendos. It has a strange mix of oblique emotional observation that is almost as good as Anna Karenina and characters that foghorn the director’s thoughts for him. Some characters feel like real people, others made up.


But it’s a very good film.


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Ellie and the armour

Ellie and the armour


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Hey Baby, Do You Dyad?

Hey Baby, Do You Dyad?

Gamasutra - Hey Baby, Do You Dyad? A Letter Series


More and more people are writing more and more things about the intersection of videogames with everything else.


“Because I’m having a hard time deciding something about Dyad. I want to say "it might be good, but I don’t like it” or “I might like it, in spite of the fact it isn’t good,” and I can’t decide which of these is true.“


and


"That’s part of the reason I’m picking your brain about why you like it. Because it’s so absurd it makes you laugh? That’s what you said about music. You also said that about sex.”


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Interesting analyses of Realm of the Mad God and Demon's Souls

Interesting analyses of Realm of the Mad God and Demon's Souls

Analyze: Realm of the Mad God

Analyze: Demon's Souls


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Insightful analysis of Demon's Souls that digs below the high difficulty and savours the subtle pleasures yielded by a taste acquired

Insightful analysis of Demon's Souls that digs below the high difficulty and savours the subtle pleasures yielded by a taste acquired

Analyze: Demon's Souls


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Truth in Game Design, a talk by Jonathan Blow

Truth in Game Design, a talk by Jonathan Blow

http://www.gdcvault.com/play/1014982/Truth-in-Game


Blow says that a designer can create a system that exhibits behaviours more complex than the rules that govern it. He says that, in all systems, there are places that reflect our corporeal universe. These places are truths in our real lives. He says that a designer can design by creating and exploring systems and then isolating and presenting the truths he finds.


A while ago, I saw another talk by Blow that is a development of these themes. It is also very good, but less focused and a less pure expression of the central idea.


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In the summer with my niece.

In the summer with my niece.


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Jonathan Blow: Indie Prototyping

Jonathan Blow: Indie Prototyping

Jonathan Blow: Indie Prototyping - YouTube


Enthralling talk by Jonathan Blow about how he prototypes game ideas. To him, a prototype is a one or two week project that answers one question: should I make this into a full game? As illustration, he shows an array of interesting prototypes he has made.


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A box for the only person I know who every so often likes to live in a tree

A box for the only person I know who every so often likes to live in a tree


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Angel Olsen - Miranda

Angel Olsen - Miranda

08 Miranda.mp3


“Was I another in and out of your door?”


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Looking after Matthew. (Read: playing Halo Wars on the projector at his house.)

Looking after Matthew. (Read: playing Halo Wars on the projector at his house.)


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Those little constants in your game code determine how your game feels. When you design a game, your entities should have roles that neither overlap, nor leave gaps

Those little constants in your game code determine how your game feels. When you design a game, your entities should have roles that neither overlap, nor leave gaps

http://www.gdcvault.com/play/1012211/Design-in-Detail-Changing-the


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A fascinating explanation of the incomprehensible denouement of a pro Street Fighter bout

A fascinating explanation of the incomprehensible denouement of a pro Street Fighter bout

Official Evo Moment #37, Daigo vs Justin Evo 2004 in HD - YouTube


“Justin had developed this style with Chun-Li where he played very conservatively,” Killian explained. “He’s trying to do nothing and say look, Chun-Li’s options in this game are so safe that I don’t actually need to do anything to attack. I can just whittle you down until I win.” Not only was this a sound, if slightly lame, strategy, it was working against one of the best players in the world. Umehara tends to be a much more aggressive player, and the strain of playing against Wong’s ultra-conservative Chun-Li was beginning to show. “Daigo, in rare form, actually seemed to be upset. He was playing recklessly,” Killian said. “This is one of the joys of fighting game play, you can actually put someone off their game, and get into their head until they start making mistakes.” Soon Umehara had been taken down to his “last few pixels” of health, but Wong continued to play it safe. Umehara had a little room to breathe. “Daigo goes back to his corner to recalculate and think about what he’s going to do here,” Killian told the Penny Arcade Report. “Does he have a way across this expanse of screen to get in and trip Justin up? He knew that he didn’t.” Killian also pointed out that immense pressure that Wong was under in this situation. He’s one of the last Americans left standing in the tournament, and they’re on American soil. He’s also enjoying a huge advantage against one of the best players in the world. Killian put it bluntly. “[Wong] had [Umehara] on his knees, so to speak. Although Justin is at a very strong advantage, ironically that’s creating a huge amount of pressure from the crowd and the situation.” Wong needed only to land a single hit to secure the win. The next attack would deal enough damage to end the match, even if Umehara were able to block. Both players understood that Wong had to attack to win, and it was at this moment that Umehara found his strategy. “If you watch the moments preceding Justin doing the super, Daigo is moving at pace with him across the screen as Justin dances back and forth,” Killian said. “Daigo is mirroring his actions. That’s not an accident. Daigo has made his play.” The bet was that Justin would “mentally break,” as Killian puts it, and go for the most obvious, flashiest way to end the match. Wong doesn’t need to land a solid hit to end the match, even the small amount of damage dealt by a blocked attack would be enough to gain the win. Chun-Li’s super would allow Wong to attack with a kind of safety net: as long as one of those kicks landed, even if it was blocked, Wong has won the match. It’s a safe, obvious play, and it lost Wong the match. “Any time you have knowledge of what your opponent is going to do in a fighting game, that’s something you can leverage against them,” Killian said. “Daigo knows that Justin wants to close this out, and of course the most dramatic way to do so is to use the super. Daigo won’t have any life left to block it, and it’s quite difficult to parry.” So what happens next? “Justin cracks,” Killian explained. Wong attacked with the super, but Umehara not only knew it was coming, he had been keeping the correct distance between the two characters to parry each of the kicks. A parry is different from a block in that you deflect the attack and take no damage, although the move requires precise timing. In this case, Umehara had to successfully parry each of the kicks to survive. “The thing with parrying that super is that it’s so fast you have to be parrying at the time the super flashes, you can’t react to it,” Killian said. “You can’t see the flash and start tapping the parry out. You have to be parrying by the time the super is initiated, which takes a lot of prediction. That’s why Daigo is mirroring, he’s holding the distance he needs to be away from Chun-Li’s super in order to parry.” Onlookers and fans leapt to their feet during this move and began to cheer, but Killian explained that the physical act of parrying was only part of the story. The real genius at work was the mental acuity needed to set up the play. “There was no luck involved,” Killian told the Penny Arcade Report. “The skill in parrying the super is difficult, but it’s something anyone can learn with muscle memory. You can go into practice and tap it out. The real genius of the move was the fact [Umehara] was able to be parrying before the move started, he had the correct anticipation of Justin’s move. The real strength of the play was mental, it was the read of the situation.” Killian continues to talk about the match, and it’s clear that he’s fascinated by it to this day. “It was such an incredible read and such an incredible move of Jiu Jitsu to take someone’s advantage and use it against them in such a brilliant way, on top of it being an impressive technical feat, on top of the pressure of the room,” he said, counting off the many ways the match was notable. “One of Daigo’s great abilities is to ignore the pressure of those situations, at least outwardly. He has a lot of inner calm.” There’s a lesson to be learned here. Once a strategy has proven successful against an opponent, players find themselves tempted by safer attacks in an attempt to end the match by inflicting block damage. “People are still doing it!” Killian said, exasperated. “It’s a common strategy in tournament play, and it makes you vastly more predictable!” The amount of strategy, training, and thought went into that one moment of tournament-level play is inspiring. It took Seth Killian almost 15 minutes to describe and explain all the intricacies of the players' actions and reactions. It took me around 1,200 words to write it out. All for a single minute of a single match of a fighting game. The parry was impressive, but it was icing on a cake that Daigo Umehara baked before Wong had a chance to attack. This is what happens when a player transcends normal play and creates art.


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Hurray for the Riff Raff playing a gig outside in a residential neighbourhood in New Orleans

Hurray for the Riff Raff playing a gig outside in a residential neighbourhood in New Orleans

Hurray for the Riff Raff :: Full Session via Liveset - YouTube


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My niece thrashes me at Bagatelle. (Taken with Instagram)

My niece thrashes me at Bagatelle. (Taken with Instagram)


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Skunk Works (Taken with Instagram)

Skunk Works (Taken with Instagram)


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Brooklyn Bridge at 6.14 a.m. this morning (Taken with Instagram)

Brooklyn Bridge at 6.14 a.m. this morning (Taken with Instagram)


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At the MOMA restaurant (Taken with Instagram)

At the MOMA restaurant (Taken with Instagram)


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How to Solve It (Taken with Instagram)

How to Solve It (Taken with Instagram)


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Playing MarioKart with Danielle on the SNES. Still so much fun. (Taken with Instagram)

Playing MarioKart with Danielle on the SNES. Still so much fun. (Taken with Instagram)


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My shadow on the Long Island Rail Road. (Taken with Instagram)

My shadow on the Long Island Rail Road. (Taken with Instagram)


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Dear and the Headlights, Saintly Rows (Oh Oh) + Willetta

Dear and the Headlights, Saintly Rows (Oh Oh) + Willetta

Dear and the Headlights: Live @ Sams (Part 3) - YouTube


Everyone has a band that they think are criminally under popular. Dear and the Headlights are mine. The thing is, I think Dear and the Headlights have the most beautiful melodies ever written. Which means they should be the most popular band in the world, right?


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Dark Dark Dark, Wild Goose Chase

Dark Dark Dark, Wild Goose Chase

Dark Dark Dark - Wild Goose Chase (live at Le Poisson Rouge) - YouTube


“For I end up in a circular path,

On a pilgrimage leading straight back.

To where I know that I’ll drop my guitar.

I’ll abandon my car on the highway,

Don’t send me away.

Don’t send me upon this wild goose chase”


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Mary, with chocolate chips. (Taken with Instagram)

Mary, with chocolate chips. (Taken with Instagram)


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This morning, I made what will be my second PB&J for my packed lunch. I also have Oreos. (Taken with instagram)

This morning, I made what will be my second PB&J for my packed lunch. I also have Oreos. (Taken with instagram)


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Under the bridge (Taken with instagram)

Under the bridge (Taken with instagram)


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Down by the canal in London (Taken with instagram)

Down by the canal in London (Taken with instagram)


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Arvo Pärt, Spiegel im Spiegel

Arvo Pärt, Spiegel im Spiegel

SpiegelImSpiegel.mp3


This piece has followed me in my head for years. It’s on the soundtrack to Heaven, a film that is ninety minutes of living in the times between times, living in the time you’ve got left, living in the time made golden by your doom.


That short passage, where the violin comes in and plays one long note and then goes up an interval and plays another long note, to me embodies the sensation of knowing you are living through an achingly beautiful moment, and knowing it is passing, and knowing that the knowledge of the passing is what turns mundane happiness into stabbing beauty.


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“Mary is not dead woooo” cake made by Ellie to celebrate my third year of successfully not dying (Taken with instagram)

“Mary is not dead woooo” cake made by Ellie to celebrate my third year of successfully not dying (Taken with instagram)


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Ellie and Isla. Words fail me. (Taken with instagram)

Ellie and Isla. Words fail me. (Taken with instagram)


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Taxi Driver

Taxi Driver

I love this shot from Taxi Driver. Even though Travis Bickle is supposedly God's lonely man, we know him as the subject of a Hollywood film. But, earlier in the film, in this shot, he is just another unremarkable guy, alone in the early morning, in the distance, swigging from a bottle of whiskey.



And I love how, in the "Are you talking to me?" scene, you can hear the everyday noise of people outside as Travis Bickle goes mad inside:


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Mary Hard at Work, by Ellie (Taken with instagram)

Mary Hard at Work, by Ellie (Taken with instagram)


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Tool, Third Eye

Tool, Third Eye

15 Third Eye.mp3


Tool and Mogwai made me realise that musicians are allowed to do anything they want.


But Tool had a stronger effect because they were my first real exposure to metal, which meant they were able to crystalise the most consistently important concept in my musical taste: beauty is harsh.


I first heard Mogwai in 1997, when I was about sixteen. I was lying in bed in the dark listening to The Breezeblock, Mary Ann Hobbs’s late night music programme on Radio One. She played Like Herod, a twelve-minute track from Mogwai’s first album, Young Team. I hadn’t heard music like that before: instrumental by default, symphonically structured, spoken word, moods rather than songs, occasional vocals that were accents, rather than scaffolding, and incongruous shifts in instrumentation and tone from section to section. I thought that Mogwai had, somehow, invented all this stuff. It wasn’t until 2002 that I realised that Slint had already got most of the way there by 1991.


I first heard Tool in 1998, when I was seventeen. My friend, Harry, lent me their 1996 album, Aenima, and I took it home and played it through the speakers built into the monitor of my Mac. I played it a lot over the next five or six years on my CD Walkman.


Aenima took me much further than Young Team. It was the first piece of modern music in which I heard the non-standard time signatures. It was the first record I heard that combined anger and sadness and melody into beauty. It was the first record I heard that had an overarching theme. The first record I heard that had continuity between songs. It made me consciously seek out weird, extreme music, music that would broaden my horizons and maybe give my brain more versions of that moment in Third Eye when Maynard James Keenan sings, “So good to see you, I missed you so much”: the joyous/agonising high of a sound that is simultaneously sad and beautiful, melodic and abrasive.


Most importantly, it was the record that made me fully aware of the fact that music doesn’t just come from some obscured, instinctual, idiot savant place in the brain. It is intentional art, just like novels and films and paintings. It is - can be - a series of conscious decisions, some of which the musician is unsure of. This is excellently illustrated in Third Eye by the two moments when Maynard James Keenan sings, “Prying open my third eye.” The first time, it stops the song with the long, arrhythmic pauses between repetitions. The second time, it is in parallel with a polyrhythmic drum beat, and repeated many more times, and totally cathartic.


Fourteen years later, poor Harry still hasn’t had his CD back.


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The new Moonface record is out today

The new Moonface record is out today


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Keaton Henson, Small Hands

Keaton Henson, Small Hands

Keaton Henson - Small Hands - YouTube


I really like this video. A sad, simple story.


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Eating breakfast with my niece at her little table. (Taken with instagram)

Eating breakfast with my niece at her little table. (Taken with instagram)


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Moonface with Siinai, Headed for the Door

Moonface with Siinai, Headed for the Door

08 Headed For The Door.mp3


Dear Sarah,


I heard that you’ve turned into a goth, and I think that’s great, if that’s what makes you happy. I have an old pair of black boots with silver buckles that I don’t wear anymore, and you can have them if you want them. Also, I wanted to ask: What, if anything, is fluttering in your heart? I wanted to ask if it has to be a black crow or a vampire bat… or if maybe instead it could be a kite that has broken loose from the string that you were holding—or the string that we were holding—sometime when we were teenagers, or maybe in our early twenties? Could it be a kite which is now rolling over and over on itself in the sky like an unborn baby, and slowly shrinking into a dot, and then a spec of black, and then something we’re not even sure we’re watching, but then, for sure, absolutely nothing at all? Get back to me about this when you have a chance.


I hope you’re doing well.


xo

s


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Animal Collective, Fireworks

Animal Collective, Fireworks

Animal Collective - Fireworks.mp3


The sound of summer.


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Girl Walk All Day

Girl Walk All Day

Girl Walk // All Day: Chapter 2 on Vimeo


I like dance movies. Somehow, though they often appear indistinguishable from music videos, they are not boring. This clip is one track’s worth of a dance movie of pure joy set to Girl Talk’s album, All Day.


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Des Ark, My Saddle Is Waitin’ (C'mon Jump On It)

Des Ark, My Saddle Is Waitin’ (C'mon Jump On It)

Des Ark - house show (solo) - YouTube


I think I’ve posted this video to every blog I’ve ever had. It shows my favourite performance of my favourite Des Ark song. But, further, it depicts an incredibly rich and specific scene: a gig in someone’s house, members of the audience standing around and as important in the frame as Aimée Argote, her too-small guitar, a gig that appears to be boiling hot when she wipes the sweat from the face with her t-shirt that is part of a utilitarian I-have-been-on-tour-for-weeks outfit, and the intro she gives that lasts longer than the song and that reflects the other bands at the gig.


This is my second favourite performance of this song. You will notice that it includes her whole band. You will also notice that the video has absolutely no atmosphere. However, I love how fast the song moves along, and I love the way she sings the “I know” in “And I know I’m using drugs every morning” as a half-screech.


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Bob Dylan, Mr. Tambourine Man

Bob Dylan, Mr. Tambourine Man

07 Mr. Tambourine Man.mp3


Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free

Silhouetted by the sea

Circled by the circus sands

With all memory and fate

Driven deep beneath the waves

Let me forget about today until tomorrow


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Jeffrey Lewis, The Chelsea Hotel Oral Sex Song

Jeffrey Lewis, The Chelsea Hotel Oral Sex Song

04 The Chelsea Hotel Oral Sex Song.mp3


Excerpt 1:


Though you may not believe it

You know what she says to me next

As I repeat it

That line about getting a blow job

That Leonard sings

She said it made her

Want to do naughty things

Right about then

I should have asked

If she knew

What the Chelsea charged

If we got a room for two

But I didn’t and I know

I’m a schmuck, don’t you doubt it

The only thing I did

Was write this stupid song about it

If I was Leonard Cohen

Or some other song writing master

I’d know to first get the oral sex

And then write the song after


Excerpt 2:


You may think it’s pathetic

That I sing this song

And that she will never know it

But think a minute about what that means

And you’ll realise it’s actually a wonderful thing

That all around the world

There maybe folks singing tunes

For the love of others folks

They barely knew

And it puts a smile on my face

Yes, it do

And let me tell you

You ought to be smillin too

‘Cos the next time you feeling

Kinda lonesome and blue

Just think that someone somewhere

Might be singin about you


And I love the fact that he released a version that has him gulping part way through a line.


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Delta Dart, Story of My Life

Delta Dart, Story of My Life

10 Story Of My Life.mp3


Such amazing close harmonies.


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Cat Power, In This Hole

Cat Power, In This Hole

06 In This Hole.mp3


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Roly Porter, Arrakis

Roly Porter, Arrakis

11 Arrakis.mp3


This is the final track from Aftertime. I feel bad posting it in isolation, because the album is a proper collection of tracks that has a beginning and takes you on a journey. Further, it’s unrepresentative of the rest of the album: it’s much shorter than the central pieces that are seven or eight minute worlds, it’s less measured, it’s easier. But the final foghorn blasts are such a perfect ending, such a beautiful replacement of calm and analysis with rage, that it’s my favourite.


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